First off is the 'The Brickster: Jidaigeki Legend/Miko No Kami' men’s T (in style ONE or TWO). Each one of these babies is painstakin’ly stitched together by Cafe Press’s piece workin’ ronin turned yamabushi and infused with sekrit mystical powers. Guys, boldly state that just like the Brickster, you’re a legend AND a chick magnet-well, assumin’ your wife or significant other lets you be. It practically screams out “Yes, Bush-ido is practiced here.” Let it be known to shrine maidens across the land that there’s a safe haven to be found in your arms! Now, while we can’t guarantee that wearin’ this shirt will draw those cute gals in the sexy red and white outfits from miles around to you like a beacon in the darkness, it sure works that way for me. Will beauteous shrine maidens be magikally compelled to seek your protection and paw your body through the rich, comfortable fabric? Well, bub, you’ll never know unless you buy one.
And assumin’ that shirt works for you the way it works for me, what better gift to give afterwards than the brand new ‘Abarenbo Gaijin-Brick Layer’ T? This form-fittin’ ladies T-shirt is guaranteed to show off any woman’s up-front assets to maximum advantage. Ko looks like she's been poured into hers, and that particular drink's to my likin'. The Brickster usta have the prototypes made up in bulk and has been passin’ 'em out as keepsakes to his more…shall we say, forthcomin’ female fans. It’d be tough to find a gal in Kyoto that doesn’t have one of these secreted away in her closet. You’ll also see Tomoe Gozen, Ichi, the Princess of the Mirth Spider Tribe, and other hot historical babes wearin’ these in ‘Abarenbo Gaijin-Season Three’! Ladies, it’s your chance to boast to the world of your proud conquest-heck, it’s practically a feminist statement! Join the ranks of the ‘Brick Layers’ and impress all your friends. Be the envy of the crowd at the next ‘Brick McBurly Valentines Day Hot Tub Party’! Make sure to think up a convincin’ cover story if you plan on wearin’ it in front of your husband, though, cause I'll deny everythin'.
Lastly, you can try’n pass yerself off as a member of the Abarenbo Gaijin production staff with the gah-ran-teed to impress ‘Abarenbo Gaijin Staff’ T (in style ONE or TWO), usin’ the show’s revamped logo. You know that if Elvis or Nobunaga were still alive, they’d be sportin’ one of these bad boys. Wear it in Japan and use it as an icebreaker to pick up chicks in Shibuya! Enthrall your friends and family with tales of your time on the set and the off screen camaraderie between cast and crew! Don’t worry-the ‘ol Brickster’ll back up any crazy story you make up-I do it for Obenjo and Ashigaru all the time. That’s what pals are for, right?
Guys, show yakuza punks, bill collectors, and unwashed two-sword ronin that you ain't someone to be trifled with-and ya just KNOW they're a garn-teed chick magnet to boot! It's a little known historical fact that Hideyoshi wore a Brick McBurly Tee the whole time he was unifyin' Japan and sleepin' with dozens of beautiful women! And ya know that if Lord Kira's Brick McBurly Tee hadn't been gettin' warshed that night, those nasty 47 Ronin wouldn't have dared messed with him.
"Me and the boys of the Shinsengumi have a propensity to kick Loyalist wussy butt when we're wearing our Brick McBurly Tees! They also give us the confidence to endure the unendurable-the brickbats of LtDomer. And boy, do we ooze machismo doing it. That's an important concern for us."-Kondo Isami, Bureau Chief
"This isn't over! I'll get you for this!"-Miyamoto Musashi, overrated clown
"Before I wore a Brick-Tee, I was a nothing. Now that I have one, I am a somebody. When wearing a Brick-Tee, even Sugar Ray couldn't knock me down. He really couldn't. You hear that, Ray? You can't knock me down, Ray. You can't knock me down, Ray."-Former Heavyweight Boxing Champion Jake "Raging Bull" LaMotta
"Brick, are you bothering people with your silliness again?"-Koyori McBurly, costar of Abarenbo Gaijin